Remember

You know it's not always what the trainees do for me (how they make me feel, the potential I see in them) that keeps me here, but also what I see in my fellow volunteers that makes me want to be part of all this.

Like the 'go-all-out' attitude towards trainees, assuring me that all the internal struggles I put up with each week (while fighting for time to complete personal tasks) are worth the effort. Like the displays of extraordinary patience and other outstanding qualities shining through every unassuming appearance, causing me much pain and embarrassment as my own conduct pales in comparison.

Every person I have come to know through this volunteering platform is a gem in every sense of the word. The moment I look at one, I cannot help but hold my gaze. Even when several of them are gathered together, each is still so dazzling one simply cannot deny the individual contributions that result in this collective brilliance.

And I remember. How the unrefined stone that was I, gradually obtained some luminance of my own, when different gems rubbed off their magnificence on me. So grateful shall I always be. For the constant inspiration, for the unceasing encouragement. If occasionally I seem to have forgotten and gone away, know that I see the things you have done for everyone, which therefore includes me.

For contributing in your own special way, my world has become such a meaningful place.

Thank you.

Huizhen

Ways to address challenging behaviours and emotions

I attended the talk by MINDS "Ways to address challenging behaviours and emotions" last Tue. Just want to share with you...

First, we must know what is the purpose of the behaviour? Almost all behaviours have a purpose.
1. Attention
2. Defiant
3. Angry
4. Tired
5. Long day
6. Health reason (Physical/Mental)

Some challenging behaviours/emotions
1. Aggression
2. Self-injury
3. Definace
4. Hyperactivity
5. Anxiety
6. Depression
7. Sleep disturbances
8. Stereotypic behaviours

Strategies were discussed to handle such behaivours/emotions.
1. Using diversion to another activity
2. Teach to communicate what they want
3. Ground rules
4. Clear, calm instruction
5. Directed discussion
6. Ignoring
7. Logical consequences
8. Over-correction
9. Cool-off (or Time out)

Some discussion were done on the strategies!

1. Using diversion to another activity
- Preventive
- when you observe that your traniee may start to show some challenging behaviour (e.g. looking sad, grumpy, twitching fingers, crying softly, refusing to eat, etc)
- Get attention
- Redirect to another activity then praise

I remember such technique was used on Weizhi. Once he started to show sign of frustration, he was brought to listen to his favorite CD to calm him down. Only after that could we get him do another task. You must be able to identify the signs of your trainee and think what activity you will want him to be re-direct to.

2. Yan Hong shared on her experience on "teach to communicate what they want". She has a student who will yell/talk loudly when she is upset. What Yan Hong did was she will talk to her in a gentle voice and keep repeating to her student to speak gently (emphasising gently throughout the course of the communication) and it worked.

3. Some "ground rules" could be set so that your trainee established a common understanding with you what could not be done in certain settings. E.g. Remember we tell Weizhi not to jump inside enclosed areas (classroom) and he is able to do so in open areas? Other ground rules could include talk nicely, no-shouting, walking no running.

4. On "clear, calm instructions", when a behvaiour is inappropriate, you give a clear instruction about what to stop doing, and what to start doing. E.g. "Rina, stop crying. Please get ready to go to the centre."

5. In "directed discussion", it is used for minor behaviour and when your trainee is likely to practice "good" behaviour when reminded. E.g. "That is not where your shoes should be put - where should they go?"

6. Ignoring is usually applied on minor behaviours that are meant for attention, e.g. whining, soft crying, shouting briefly. Initially, when you start using ignoring, the problem may become worse, before getting better. You will only pay attention when the person has stopped the behaviour and praise. E.g. "It is good that you have stopped crying. Now please take your bath"

Take for the case of someone who is attention seeking. If we scold him when he does wrong and hardly praises him (said something to him) when he does right, how will he feel? Will he be "encourage" to do wrong since that's the time he will get your attention? Always remember to praise to encourage good behaviour. Don't be stingy with your praise!

That's about it... think about it :)

-choon seng